Understanding Trauma: How the Body Holds the Story (and Where Healing Begins)

by Samantha Sebastian, LMFT

When the body remembers what the mind tries to forget

Have you ever reacted strongly to something small, like a specific sound, a pungent smell, or a sharp tone of voice, and not fully understood why?

That’s the body remembering.

Trauma isn’t only what happened to us; it’s also what stayed inside us when we didn’t have enough safety or support to process it. Psychiatrist Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score, describes trauma as “an imprint left by that experience on mind, brain, and body.” Even when the event is long past, the body can continue to respond as if danger is still present.

The Science: Why Trauma Lives in the Body

When we face threat, our autonomic nervous system automatically activates one of three primary survival responses: fight, flight, or freeze.

This process is beautifully mapped in Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, which helps us understand how our physiology determines our felt sense of safety.

When trauma occurs, the body can become stuck in the fight, flight, or freeze state long after the actual threat has passed. That “stuck” energy shows up as chronic anxiety, hypervigilance, exhaustion, emotional numbing, or even physical symptoms like headaches, digestive issues, or pain.

And here’s the part that often surprises people: talking about trauma alone doesn’t always heal it, and can sometimes make us feel worse.

When we repeatedly describe or mentally replay what happened without also re-wiring how the body experiences safety, we can unintentionally re-activate the same physiological stress response that occurred during the original event.

In other words, the brain and body don’t distinguish between actually reliving the trauma and vividly remembering it.

Our heart rate quickens, muscles tense, and stress hormones surge as if the danger were happening again right now.

That’s why purely cognitive processing can leave us feeling flooded, stuck, or even retraumatized.

To truly heal, we have to involve the body - not just talk about what happened, but help our nervous system learn that it’s safe now.

As Dr. Bessel van der Kolk explains in The Body Keeps the Score, “You can’t fully recover until you feel safe in your own skin.”

Somatic and body-based practices allow us to complete unfinished defensive responses and bring the body back into regulation, so the story of trauma can finally settled.

Somatic and Body-Based Ways to Heal

Below are gentle, research-supported approaches that help the nervous system release stored tension and rediscover safety.

1. Grounding Through the Senses

Engage sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste to bring awareness to the present moment.

• Name five things you see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, one you can taste.

• This anchors your brain in the “here and now,” signaling that the danger is over.

2. Breathwork for Regulation

Slow, deep breathing activates the ventral vagal pathway—the body’s natural calming system.

• Try box breathing (inhale 4 – hold 4 – exhale 4 – hold 4) or extended exhale breathing (inhale 4 – exhale 6).

• Over time, this retrains your body to access calm more easily.

3. Movement and Tremor Release

Gentle movement such as yoga, stretching, walking, dancing, helps discharge the survival energy held in the muscles.

Even small, mindful movements restore a sense of control and vitality.

4. Body-Based Psychotherapies

Working with a trauma-informed therapist can deepen this process. Evidence-based approaches include:

• Somatic Experiencing (SE): Tracks body sensations to complete unfinished defensive responses.

• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing): Uses bilateral stimulation to help the brain integrate traumatic memories.

• Sensorimotor Psychotherapy: Combines talk therapy with posture and movement awareness.

• IFS (Internal Family Systems): Uses “parts work” to cultivate safety and compassion toward inner experiences.

5. Social Engagement and Co-Regulation

Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. Safe relationships with friends, partners, therapy, pets, or others within your community, help the nervous system relearn trust and connection. Eye contact, gentle tone, and shared laughter all cue the body that it’s safe to rest.

Gentle Reflection

“What does my body need right now to feel just a little safer?”

Start small: noticing breath, softening shoulders, or feeling your feet on the ground. Each time you respond to your body with compassion instead of judgment, you’re rewriting the story that trauma once told.

The Path Forward

Trauma can fragment our sense of self, but healing gathers those parts back together. As van der Kolk reminds us, “The body keeps the score—but it can also be the scoreboard for recovery.”

If you’re ready to explore body-based healing, therapy can offer a safe place to start listening inward again.

→ Learn more about trauma-informed therapy and nervous-system regulation by scheduling a free 20-minute consultation call with me.